The only boy that I could ever love opened the door with a credit card when I was passed out on the couch, shook me to life. Loser, addict, fiend, junkie, whore, these are the word I associate with myself these days. I get smashed, I get my heart bruised. I fall apart with your name on my mind, just begging and clawing, not wanting to be high anymore and tomorrow I say that I will stop but you know that�s a lie, too.

Someone needs to know the complete truth.

I don�t care about very much anymore but I used to care about absolutely everything. I used to think I was ugly and disgusting. Everyone disagreed, this might prove them wrong. Who needs this junk.

I try to stay clean for a day but by the end I�m thinking it�s not worth it and there I am, huffing duster and crying my eyes out.